After a long time....

Assalamualaikum, phew it"s been a very long time since I've updated my last post. LOL. I must've been saying to myself, why do I even have a blog when I'm not updating it like other bloggers. Not my intention to become a blogger since I made blog just for fun.




Alright, many things happened in my life. ESPECIALLY in 2016!!! 
Should I tell here...? Yes.....No......? Who knew right, shit happened and my life blooms back! Awesome isn't it? Okay wanna tell you some serious shit here. I am superly highly motivated with vloggers right now! no kidding. Johanis Sani and Cupcake Aisyah etc. but these two ARE . MY . FAVORITE .

They've been travelling and do reviews and shopping and makeups and stuffs and having fun! So I just tell myself, why not... why not you try vlogging?! to be honest, I'm camera shy but why not since I can improve my language wise, boost my confidence about myself (easily insecure, most of the time) and try to do something new! something that might brings me happiness about what I'm doing. yeah no shit I wanna vlog so bad. oh psst, disclaimer : "I'M GONNA START VLOGGING WHEN I TRAVEL AT THE END OF MY FOUNDATION STUDIES"..... disclaimer again : "WITH A NEW VLOGGING CAMERA".... suuuuuuuuperrrr excited. Oh ya, where am I going to travel? Let's just wait and see shall we, don't wanna ruin the surprise don't we geng. yeah yeah "orang travel satu dunia tak bagitau pun lah tak kecoh lah, jemah ja" 

Well, I get superly excited about something so screw it! I wanna tell the world how happy I am!!!! oh ya I have so many things to tell about wonderful things happened to me in 2017. hope it's not too late, of course it's late, March already and now you're gonna some 2017 resolution shit, ya why not. 

1) Alhamdulillah, still got my parents and another joyful year insyaAllah with my very little family. oh lord i love them so much and i've no idea what will I be without them. Like seriously, I'm the only child and they're the only reason i survived and gone through with my life!

2) oh ya this is the part where people are so eager and jemah to know about. He's back. Back in my life. Ain't gonna tell detail bout it but some things should never be changed and it should stays as it should be. aimansyahida ceyyyyyyyyyy ok stahp

3) Got superly great bestfriend whom I hope will stay with me forever through thick and thin. ya her name is Aida and i love her so much. She's..... i don't know how to describe her but she's a ah-may-zing! i've known her since last June and we get closer and closer like we've been known for a very long time. to be honest, I can be myself around her and I'm so lucky we got our each other's back here in UIA even when we got separated when she had to move to KMPP while i'm still in KMK. yeah she'd been through a lot and I'm glad that I got her back. 

4) Beloved roommates! They are the Bomb! imagine going back exhaustedly from class and you just can't wait to meet your very caring and fun roommates. yeah, they are a very great company to keep, not too wild, not too saint, just nice baby just nice. I wish you readers could meet them they're just so fun to be friend with.

1)Farhah

2)Me 
   
 3)Ummi (she's playing role as a witch for theater and I did her makeup      

4) adibah

This my girl, Aida Afrina

Here he is......

 Love of my life

Alright, I think I'll end my blog here. I'll update more soon insyaAllah.

*If you enjoy reading my posts, do comment and let me know if you want me to write more and your opinion about me vlogging....*
   

Feels

It's funny how my hearts keeps on hurting itself for the same person. Literally i cried for 3 days after what he said to me and it hurts like hell. I cried in the shower, I cried when I sleep, I even cried when I woke up, i cried when i walked to koop to buy foods for sahur. I cried every time.





 But he doesn't even bother me or even notice my depression. This things bother me and I tried busy myself with stuffs like made my bed, washing all my clothes, walk around campus, listen to music. Somehow everything is related to him. And I'll start crying, again. Why? Why? Why? Why he have to show me all this and why am I even botherrrrr when he doesn't even give a single damnnnnnn gosh i hate myself for being this way. I feel so weak and hopeless. Kita "kawan rapat" really hits me hard. Like every time I remember it, I'll cry the shit out of me. But nah, you don't know how much i've cried because of you and still you act like everything's okay and under your control, you don't know that, everything you posted on the social media, makes me so curious about you, and makes me feel "who r u" day by day. It's like you're a stranger and the new person. But somehow I can't do the same things you did, because I can't hurt the person i love  and care so much in my life, but you can. It's just that i need to be vanish out of your life like the mermaid becomes bubble for the sake of her prince. You make me sad every day now. Like every day. And I can't let this controls me. I'm strong as i always be and I can't let you bring me down. I'll go out of your life

KMK & FUTURE

Hi. Assalamualaikum.

So. It’s my fourth day in KMK. So far so good. Great new friends, cool roommates, cozy bed, friendly lecturers. Biasalah homesick itu biasa beb. Anak tunggal pulak tu. Tapi serious talk aku tak pernah nangis bila jauh dari ibu ayah even asrama sekolah sekali pun. Nangis stress study pernah lah.
Okay actually nak cakap pasal modul yang aku dapat ni. Di matriks ada 3 modul bagi student sains.




MODUL 1 : Maths, Biology, Chemistry, Physics.
MODUL 2 : Maths, Physics, Chemistry, Science Computer
MODUL 3 : Maths, Biology, Chemistry, Science Computer

Aku target dari awal lagi aku nak modul 2. Kononnya sebab nak lari Bio. Aku takdaklah benci sangat bio tu.. actually favourite masa SPM dulu. Sebab cikgu yang ajar aku dulu ohsem giler yang membuatkan aku minat bio. Tapi tah oleh sebab aku tak dapat A masa spm dlu macam frust lah jugak, tapi aku dapat B+ untuk Physics so aku rasa mcm aku ke arah Physics. KONON.

TETIBA!!!!!! Aku dapat modul 1………. Jadi terfikir sejenak nak tukar modul ke tak. Apa gila ka aku nak ambik sains hayat yang ada 3 beradik tu sekali. masyaAllah. Sooo aku pun terketar ketar menggigil gelisah nak ambil ke tak boring tukar modul tu. Aku juga consult kak kak senior pasal modul2 ni. Hurm….. bila piker balik, dulu aku tak perform sebab aku terlalu bebankan otak aku yang kecik ni dengan Bahasa Arab, Sejarah, QS, Syariah apa semua kot. Tapi masuk matrik nix de lah subj lain yang teruk selain bio dan maths(addmath). Aku yakinkan diri aku yang aku boleh utk peroleh 4 FLAT di KMK ni…

Lagipun ada lecturer boek punya di KMK ni yang perform giler bio beb. Katanya 75% pelajar A dalam PSPM. Aku pun tertarik dan nak pulun gilerrr sains hayat ni. Aku tau aku boleh sebab tu aku nak cabar diriku yang tak pernah perform masa sekolah dulu. Alah. Kena lah usaha. Tak usaha nak berjaya macam mana. Balik rumah tido gemukkan diri lagi bagus.
Okay, kalau aku dapat 3.7 above untuk habis sem nanti apa aku nak buat dengan sijil Matrik yang boleh mohon penjawat awam ni???? APA??? BOLEH KERJA KE BEB??? Ye, boleh kerja. Tapi boleh lah aku nak kerja kejap… travel kerrrr. Oceh. Amin. Then aku nak masuk U. U mana? Hati u boleh? Eh dak dak.
UM ke, USM ke, UIA ke…. Course apa beb? Hurm tu aku tak fikir lagi. Teruk. Apa nak jadi pun xtau ka idzni. Ya aku xtahu. Sebab awal2 tu aku nak jadi dentist, then tetiba engineer lak, then tetiba arkitek lak, then engineer balik, then dah masuk sains hayat ni tetiba rasa nak yang first tu balik. Dentist, sebab tu yang aku nak dari dulu lagi. ATAU! Jadi lecturer matrik balik. Uuuuu. Mcm mana tu..?

Okay, first sem nanti, kalau siapa yang perform giler 3.5 above, boleh mohon jadi lecturer Matrik. Eh jap bukan calang calang nihhhh. Boleh sambung luar negara tauuuuu. Ada Aussie, Jepun, UK, tah apa lagi aku lupa. Haaaa jaminan kerja dah ada, belajar luar negara lak weh. Mcm kalua masuk IPG, kena ngajar budak sekolah rendah dulu, apa semua. Dah lah aku tak suka budak budak nak ngajar budak darjah 1 pulak. Nuh uh, rosak anak orang. Bukan nak kutuk budak IPG eh nooooo, aku yang tak nak. Lagipun nak apply xleh sbb bukan 5 A kan. Huahuahuahua.
So antara dua tu lah. Dentist au Lecturer. Nanti kita tengok 5 tahun lagi ehek ngadenyeeeeeeeee.


Ok tu je bye